How to offset busy times with me-times …

"... self-imposed exile 
from the day to day 
allows space to breathe 
experience gentle abundance 
of your choosing
take as long as you need ..." 

This month I’ve been doing some of the jobs I’ve put off for way too long.  I could blame lack of time, but if I’m honest, lack of motivation is more of an issue. And once I make a start, it’s hard to maintain momentum because it usually takes twice as long as I anticipated.  Such was my feeling last week when I decided to tackle the loft.  But I persevered, and it was worth the effort.  Three days later the loft was transformed and now I can find things because the boxes are labelled.    

There are things you plan to sort out, which is bad enough, but when unexpected problems crop up, it’s even worse.  I’ve lost count of the obstacles laid across my path over recent months, forcing me to change plans and lose days to dealing with an unexpected problem.  

In times such as this, it’s vital to maintain some balance in your life; otherwise it can feel like the world is against you, lobbing endless problems in your direction.  It’s generally accepted that you can’t control what happens in life; the only thing you can control is your response.  I absolutely believe that.  But I’ll also say that it helps to find balance; it’s within your power to counter the obstacles with alternatives.  They could be openings, gateways or distractions.  Call them what you will.   

This past week, I took time out of sorting the latest crisis, to attend two events that I had pre-booked and was determined not to miss.  The first was a pottery painting workshop.  I spent two blissful hours messing about with paint, sponge shapes and brushes.  I lost myself in the activity, not thinking once about the pesky issues life keeps delivering to my door.  On another day, I went to what was titled a wild swimming retreat.  I again met a wonderful bunch of women, each overcoming their own obstacles.  We walked along sea cliffs, spotting puffins, and sharing a delicious picnic lunch, before finally swimming in the sea.  During the day, we were invited to share our stories (only if we wanted to), using things on the beach to represent how we were feeling.  A common theme in our sharing was searching for balance, voicing the need to have space to be ourselves. 

I wrote this week’s poem back in April, after listening to a couple of radio programmes about people making religious pilgrimages.  It’s fair to say, I think, that most people would in the past have associated the idea of pilgrimage with religion, but not so much these days.  My idea of pilgrimage is of journey, and it doesn’t have to be physical.  It’s associated in my mind with retreat, which for me is about taking time away from the rigours of daily life, to focus on you.  It can take many forms.  

I know someone who, this week, is taking part in the Montane Summer Spine Race, a gruelling 268 miles, which must be completed within 156 hours.  I can’t think of anything worse but it’s her way of investing in herself, and I completely get that.  For others, it might be devoting yourself to watching the Word Cup or Wimbledon, reading a book or walking the dog.  

It’s the intention behind how we spend our time that matters. I could easily spend all my time on those jobs that I’ve put off.  It would be satisfying and purposeful to some degree, but hugely frustrating.  I’d end up feeling resentful.  I need me-time to reconnect with myself.  Without it, I would be lost.

I genuinely believe we’ll all have something we love to do, just for us.  What is yours?  When is the last time you did that thing? If you can’t remember, then now is the time!