Tag: balance

How to offset busy times with me-times …
```
"... self-imposed exile 
from the day to day 
allows space to breathe 
experience gentle abundance 
of your choosing
take as long as you need ..." 
```
This month I’ve been doing some of the jobs I’ve put off for way too long. I could blame lack of time, but if I’m honest, lack of motivation is more of an issue. And once I make a start, it’s hard to maintain momentum because it usually takes twice as long as I anticipated. Such was my feeling last week when I decided to tackle the loft. But I persevered, and it was worth the effort. Three days later the loft was transformed and now I can find things because the boxes are labelled.

There are things you plan to sort out, which is bad enough, but when unexpected problems crop up, it’s even worse. I’ve lost count of the obstacles laid across my path over recent months, forcing me to change plans and lose days to dealing with an unexpected problem.

In times such as this, it’s vital to maintain some balance in your life; otherwise it can feel like the world is against you, lobbing endless problems in your direction. It’s generally accepted that you can’t control what happens in life; the only thing you can control is your response. I absolutely believe that. But I’ll also say that it helps to find balance; it’s within your power to counter the obstacles with alternatives. They could be openings, gateways or distractions. Call them what you will.

This past week, I took time out of sorting the latest crisis, to attend two events that I had pre-booked and was determined not to miss. The first was a pottery painting workshop. I spent two blissful hours messing about with paint, sponge shapes and brushes. I lost myself in the activity, not thinking once about the pesky issues life keeps delivering to my door. On another day, I went to what was titled a wild swimming retreat. I again met a wonderful bunch of women, each overcoming their own obstacles. We walked along sea cliffs, spotting puffins, and sharing a delicious picnic lunch, before finally swimming in the sea. During the day, we were invited to share our stories (only if we wanted to), using things on the beach to represent how we were feeling. A common theme in our sharing was searching for balance, voicing the need to have space to be ourselves.

I wrote this week’s poem back in April, after listening to a couple of radio programmes about people making religious pilgrimages. It’s fair to say, I think, that most people would in the past have associated the idea of pilgrimage with religion, but not so much these days. My idea of pilgrimage is of journey, and it doesn’t have to be physical. It’s associated in my mind with retreat, which for me is about taking time away from the rigours of daily life, to focus on you. It can take many forms.

I know someone who, this week, is taking part in the Montane Summer Spine Race, a gruelling 268 miles, which must be completed within 156 hours. I can’t think of anything worse but it’s her way of investing in herself, and I completely get that. For others, it might be devoting yourself to watching the Word Cup or Wimbledon, reading a book or walking the dog.

It’s the intention behind how we spend our time that matters. I could easily spend all my time on those jobs that I’ve put off. It would be satisfying and purposeful to some degree, but hugely frustrating. I’d end up feeling resentful. I need me-time to reconnect with myself. Without it, I would be lost.

I genuinely believe we’ll all have something we love to do, just for us. What is yours? When is the last time you did that thing? If you can’t remember, then now is the time!

pilgrimage Download
17/06/2026
When you’re between life’s highs and lows …
```
".... seems sometimes 
you’re travelling 
in circles
mountains you thought 
you’d conquered
rise up before you 
again and again ..."
```
It’s hard to believe that we returned from our big trip to Iceland and the Faroe Islands in mid-November. Winter has been and gone and before too long, we’ll be setting out on our next trip in the camper van. I’ll be honest, it took me some time to adapt to being back home, to being fully present. Part of me was still operating at a much slower pace, Scandinavian-style. I’m not sure I’ve every truly caught up, which suits me just fine.

Of course, I’ve slipped back into lots of things almost unconsciously. I’m mentally planning out my days and writing lists. I’m back to doing all the admin stuff that takes up so much of daily life: thinking about what to cook, then cooking it; wondering what to wear; doing laundry; sorting the household accounts; tackling housework. The trappings with which we’re all familiar, right? This is normal. I get that completely. Yes, occasionally it feels mundane. Part of me yearns for the road we took round Iceland’s West Fjords, choosing where and when to swim. But, at the same time, I sometimes have to pinch myself that I’m home in what is a beautiful part of the world. Spring is in the air, and I can go cycling or running straight out of my front door. I appreciate the comforts of home, the convenience of my washing machine and kitchen. I can meet friends for coffee, have lunch with my mum, sleep in my own bed. With a wardrobe full of clothes, I can chose to dress up or dress down (let’s be honest, it’s mostly the latter!). I’ve had a winter of cinema trips and dinners dates to add variety to all the household jobs aforementioned.

This is the reality for most of us, if we are lucky. It isn’t lost on me, that it’s a luxury to have a house to clean, clothes to wash, money to spend. You only have to listen to the news to appreciate just how privileged we are. Right now, I imagine a lot of people are going through very tough times. Life sometimes can appear very black and white, but it’s rarely that straight forward.

This week’s poem could easily have been written in these times; it feels as relevant today as it did when I wrote it over a decade ago. In my experience, most of life is lived on the plateau between the peaks and troughs. It doesn’t always feel that way, most especially when you’re going through a bad patch. But a patch it is: it isn’t permanent. For good or ill, nothing ever stays the same. The highs are just as impermanent as the lows. For the most part, we live in state of flux between physical and emotional states. Every now and again, the balance will feel just right. In my own experience, that’s rare, but can and does happen.

If you, like me, are blessed, you’ll have stretches of time when life feels normal, perhaps even ordinary. Don’t underestimate times like this! I have a ceramic coaster in my house that reminds me to: enjoy the little things as one day you will look back and realise they were the big things. It sounds simple but also very wise. I wrote this poem during a difficult time in my life, juggling competing demands both at home and at work. It forced me to focus on what matters most in life. I realised it wasn’t the highs or lows where life was most lived, but in the spaces between. Give me mundane any day of the week, I’ll take it and be grateful.

the plateaux between Download
15/04/2026
What the spring equinox teaches me …
```
"... time to nurture 
the habit of gentleness 
plant seeds of kindness 
starting with myself
allow space 
for creativity to grow ..."
```
Last weekend, we in the northern hemisphere, celebrated the spring equinox, which marks a moment of balance between the light and dark, the day and night. From now until the end of June, the days will grow longer, whilst the nights grows shorter. It’s a helpful reminder, I think, that everything is connected. Springtime is the perfect opportunity to consider the different aspects of our lives and if they are held in balance. Should we be doing more of one thing and less of another? Only we can know.

I spent most of my working life searching for a better work/life balance and never really managed it. In fact, I was rubbish at it. I invariably put work first and myself last. It made me ill, not once but twice. I needed time out, and of course, I never gave myself permission to recuperate fully before, once again, diving back in. Of course, the organisation I worked for was more than happy to turn a blind eye whilst I worked myself to death, but on reflection, I know it was my own fault. I was (and remain to a lesser degree) a people pleaser. I was a woman in what still felt like a man’s world. I was bright but never brilliant, thus always felt I had to work doubly hard to keep up. It was exhausting.

When you suffer from vertigo, which affects physical balance, you will feel unsteady of your feet. There’s a constant need to check yourself. If you forget, you’re likely to stumble and fall. A lack of mental balance feels the same. I often felt anxious; I had to check myself to prevent panic setting in.

It was only when I stopped work that I truly appreciated just how important balance is. I guess I always knew this, deep down, but simply wasn’t ready to accept it. I knew that to achieve balance in my life, something had to give, and it was never going to be my job. I’m not proud of this, but it’s the truth.

When I look back now, I can see that I did relent to some degree. I stepped back when I realised that it was too much, albeit I took almost my entire career to reach that point. It came at a price but it was a price worth paying; I did recover. Recovery shouldn’t be that drastic or difficult but then, if you’ve been reading the blog, you’ll know that I usually do things the hard way. Check out my earlier post, if you haven’t seen it: https://fiwynne.com/2026/02/11/why-i-make-things-harder-than-they-have-to-be/

Spring and winter equinox, summer and winter solstice, all offer assurance that life is cyclical. If you miss an opportunity to make a change, don’t worry, it’ll come round again. I wrote this poem, not in springtime, but in autumn. When I think about it now, it makes perfect sense. Autumn’s the time you start to prepare for the following spring. You plant bulbs, giving them time to slowly settle over the winter months. Mentally, I was thinking ahead to retirement and future plans. I fully embraced the opportunity to plant new ideas, gathering momentum as my year has progressed. I sought to re-balance priorities and make space for new growth. It worked! It’s amazing what flows into your life when you make space for it to happen.

Our internal cycles don’t necessarily follow those of our planet, but there’s no better time than now to think about our life balance and consider if it’s time to plant new internal seeds, and make space for them to grow. What are you waiting for?

second springDownload
25/03/2026