When life takes an unexpected turn … 

"... everything can change 
in a heartbeat
the paths we choose 
can take a turn 
at times we least expect ..."

I mentally split any given year into quarters, starting in January. With April upon us, we’ve just entered the second quarter.  In January, I usually feel I’m on the threshold of something new but, like everyone else, I’d no idea quite what was in store this year.  So much has already happened on the world stage in 2026, it’s hard to take it all in.  

It feels like it’s been a bit of a political and emotional roller coaster in more ways than one.  It reminds me not only of the impermanence of the world, but how bewildering it all feels.  Life often doesn’t seem to make sense, not to me anyway..  We are complicated and stubborn beings aren’t we?  We’ll often stick to opinions long ingrained even when we can’t explain our logic.  We draw up our map of the world and navigate by it, despite its obvious flaws.  I know I have, over the years, developed my own belief system, which shapes how I feel and respond to most of what life throws at me.  It leaves some room for flexibility, and is fairly transparent  People who know me best will probably be able to accurately predict what I think about certain things, and how I’d react in most situations.  My belief system rarely lets me down.  But I’ll own up to the fact that it’s quirky and not necessarily failsafe.  

Perhaps we all have such a system, a sort of shorthand to help us steer a course through life without having to think everything through from scratch.  It will work for us most of the time.  But occasionally, something happens that does force a change in perspective, be that on a world-wide stage, such as the current war in the middle east, or something personal, such as a death in the family.  It doesn’t even have to be something tangible.  I’ve written in an earlier blog how exposure to art, such as music and film, can be the catalyst to bring about change.  (See the blog relating to my poem seal woman, https://fiwynne.com/2025/09/10/how-fictional-characters-can-feel-just-as-relevant-as-real-people/)

Since the beginning of this year, it feels like the political landscape has turned upside down. In that same period, I’ve been dealing with a family bereavement and preparing for a family wedding. I’ve spent time with my cousin, which brought back lots of childhood memories.  I’ve also seen two films, both of which deal with grief, that have touched me deeply, namely Hamnet and H is for Hawk.  

It was whilst watching one of these films that the seeds for this week’s poem were sown.  I suddenly felt swamped by both the complexities of life going on around me and the intimacy of my relationships with those I love most deeply.  Perhaps it’s just me, but it sometimes feels hard to balance the public and the intimate.  I struggle with it and writing poetry is a way to make sense of it for me.  Do you ever feel like things happen that force you to see the world differently?  If so, I think this week’s blog will resonate.  I hope so.  

It’s tempting to keep our thoughts to ourselves; keep our heads down when life feels too much.   Easy to put our heads in the sand and pretend nothing has changed. I’m guilty of this sometimes; I turn the news off because I can’t bear to listen.  It doesn’t work, of course, the news just keeps on happening.  In the cinema that day, I felt an overwhelming need to connect with the one I love most.  I reached out and took his hand, just briefly, because I could.  No matter how doomed the world feels on some days, it’s still true that the small intimate connections we make matter hugely.  L is indeed for loss but it is also for love.